Wrestling Wrap Up: Punk Steals Undertaker's Urn!

So last Tuesday, right after I'd finished the Wrap Up about the Undertaker's return to RAW, the news came down the wire that William Moody - AKA Paul Bearer - had passed away at the age of 58.  A sad affair indeed.  And while I wouldn't go so far as to call Paul the best wrestling manager ever (he also managed for a decade as "Percy Pringle III"), he was strikingly memorable, leaving those of us from a select generation with many memories of his shrill, warbly voice.  Plus, his willingness, as a sort of funhouse mirror reflection of Gomez Addams, to look and act absolutely grotesque is to be forever commended.

Funnest Fact: He was really a certified mortician and embalmer.  Not sure if that aspect of his vocational history ever helped him out with the Paul Bearer character, but it's a sweet tidbit.  Paul rarely had a storyline outside the orbit of The Undertaker.  When he wasn't at Taker's side, he was managing the two madmen freaks who gave Undertaker the biggest run for his undead money back in the day: Kane and Mankind.  He will be missed.  Whenever a psycho needed some extra undulating jowl action in his corner, he was there.  But with his passing I wonder...what was Punk and Taker's feud going to be about before his death?  Because his death now actually gives their feud a lot more substance.  So much so that John Cena wasn't even needed on last night's RAW.

Okay, so the WWE went there.  They used Paul's death to accentuate the story and get some nuclear heat on Punk.  I saw a lot of "EFF YOU, WWE!"s on Twitter last night, but was what we saw really all that terrible?  Okay, I know.  I was against Punk mocking Lawler's heart attack last fall.  But I still consider the live TV coronary to be a different situation than an off-air death.  I feel like we, the viewers who watched it all go down and thought Jerry was dead for over an hour, owned a piece of that.  Not a large portion, mind you, but definitely a number with a percentage sign after it.  But Jerry gave the thumbs up for it to be used, just like he did when Cole brought up the death of his mother before their WrestleMania match.

That being said, Paul's family gave permission.  They knew he'd be okay with it.  Also, his real, non-Undertaker/Kane sons were backstage at RAW last night to give their blessing.  But I understand if some people think it all went too far. We've all, including myself, become a little overly sensitive to "old school" heel-ocity.  I mean, I piss and moan about Zeb and Swagger every week, right? But I'm still of the mind that their story doesn't make any goddamn sense so I'm railing against it in the name of logicnessity.

Look, even X-Pac is standing up for the Paul Bearer angle.  And he's not at all a greasy, creepy individual who you'd file a fifty yard restraining order against at all.

That's right. Waltman's got classy coming out of his assy.  I can't wait for him to film himself having sex with an old Afghan rug he found in the dumpster behind Taco Bueno.  He does have a point though.  We need to trust in the judgement of Paul's friends and family.  Not that the WWE wouldn't have still gone through with it in some shape or form anyhow, but we're really on the "outside looking in" on this one.

So first Punk interrupted Undertaker's "mourning" of Paul Bearer and then he beat up Kane with the urn.  Then he stole borrowed the urn.  And now Undertaker has a reason to rage against Punk.  Up until now, there was an interesting angle in play, but nothing personal.  My only concern here is Punk's loss to Kane last night.

The idea here, in the "Road to WrestleMania," was for Punk to seem strong before his match with Taker.  He's coming off two losses to The Rock and one to Cena.  Was Kane's win last night merely a win for Paul?  Was it a one-off?  Because after two matches with HBK and two with Triple H, a match with Undertaker at WrestleMania doesn't quite work unless there's a shred of a chance that the challenger might actually end the streak.  It used to be enough to just have a great match, but not any more.  We need to freakin'  believe the Streak might end.  Do we think it might with Punk?  I'll tell you this.  With Punk losing to Kane last night... maybe?

Again, I'm using Opposite Momentum science.  Straight from Galileo's ballsack.  But I'm still on the fence.  In Copernicus'... backyard.  Punk might have simply lost last night because of Paul's passing.  Just something we're to forget about.  Maybe we're only supposed to remember the urn beatdown.  Still, on one night, due to some sad circumstances, this 'Mania feud has managed to eclipse all others.  Yes, Brock Lesnar came out and, via Heyman, accepted Triple H's 'Mania challenge, but given the mediocre match the two of them had at SummerSlam, no one's overly excited about this one.  Especially since there's a slight chance that Lesnar will decide that the two of them will face off in some sort of bulls*** Octagon UFC match.

Look, it's ARKANSAS HOG PEN MATCH or GTFO!

Seriously though, unless it's in a cage or something, most stipulations will only work to make Trips vs. Brock even more boring.  Unless there's blood and weapons, it's gonna blow.  And by weapons, I mean missile launchers and triggered C4 explosions.

Rhodes Scholars, Wade Barrett, Kane and the return of an old favorite on page 2...

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